It's been an interesting week in our home. My husband flew interstate for a very long stint (13 weeks in total to be exact) of work, and to say that it has affected the kids somewhat is an understatement. I've been trying to keep all systems going as per usual in an attempt to retain some form of normality. But we are all feeling the strain and the sadness of him not being here. And he's only been gone since Sunday.
We're so used to him travelling for work and being absent for one or two weeks at a time. But this time around it's different, because in the back of our minds, we know just how long it will be.
It's heartbreaking and emotionally draining when the bedtime routine evolves into tears every single night, because the kids miss Daddy. I know myself that the quietening down before sleep is also time for thinking. And missing. And feeling sad.
My shoulders are heavy from being weighed down with the burden of everyone's emotions, and so I've switched into survival mode as a means to just get through these first few days as we adapt to our new way of family life for the next three months.
My shoulders are heavy from being weighed down with the burden of everyone's emotions, and so I've switched into survival mode as a means to just get through these first few days as we adapt to our new way of family life for the next three months.
Unfortunately, survival mode means that I've also lost touch with being grateful. I'm focused on things that I'm missing out on because I'm flying solo - feeling like a Nigel-no-friends - having to be everything to everyone - dealing with defiance - not having family live just around the corner - allowing myself to drift towards discontent. And it's ugly.
The shushing, the narky voice, losing my smile and focusing on the endless to-do rather than on the ones who need me.
I heard my tone echoed in one of my children and I knew that I needed to redirect my thoughts and attitude, otherwise the three months would prove to be quite miserable for everyone.
So after turning my back on the state of the lounge room floor that is currently housing my laundry pile, I sat down to find that place of gratitude again. The one that I'd let slide due to other things crowding my time. I needed to reflect on everything that I am thankful for in order to remind myself that regardless of how tired, stretched and cranky I feel, I remain truly blessed.
I gave myself five minutes to write.....
Loving the warm Spring weather.
Hitting the gym to get those endorphins pumping.
Technology {emails, text, skype to keep us connected}.
Health - everyone is healthy!
On fire with meal planning.
Cuddles.
Laughter.
Kids' creativity and imagination.
Extra time at night to spend talking, cuddling.
Positive emails.
Writing opportunities.
Child-minding so I can work.
Prioritising self-care.
Work for Husband. Such a blessing.
Miss 9's birthday - and the fact that I've been a mother for 9 years.
Thankful for the beautiful girl she is and the lessons
she is teaching me along the way.
Afternoon sprinkler fun.
Getting my craft on.
Sleeping well.
Planning holidays.
Picnic dinners on playroom floor.
Five minutes. And my perspective changed. No longer did I feel trapped by the negative sludge that filled my mind. I felt lighter. Inspired. Grateful.
For even just the simplest of things.
Five minutes. My heart soared and I realised how much I truly am blessed.
Sometimes a gratitude check is all we need to pick ourselves up again. To look beyond the mundane and seemingly urgent and take time to be thankful.
